In Another Lifetime
by aimee hime
Summary: Usagi and Mamoru AU. With Christmas kisses, tequila body shots, and toothpastestains on pink shirts, oh, what to do? Please RR! Arigatou!


Author's Note: Hey! This is my first ever fan fiction and it is actually filled with so much love, drama and angst that… well... just read and find out! Btw, this is an AU thingy so don't get confused,'kay? And Usagi and Mamoru are kind of OOC.

On a more personal note: I would like to give a shout out to Alicia Blade and Princess Destiny. They inspired me to write my own thing. So don't forget to check out their fics.

--- Aimee Hime

Summary: Usagi and Mamoru AU. With Christmas kisses, tequila body shots, and toothpaste stains on pink shirts, oh, what to do? Please R+R! Arigatou!

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailormoon or the song "In another lifetime". Oki?

In another lifetime

The air whipped mercilessly at her. It was almost winter, and people were starting to bundle up on warm clothes.

"It has been too long..." she sighed.

(I could hold on for a hundred years)  
(When all else is gone, I would still be here)

Too long actually meant one month, one week and five days. That was how long ago Usagi last saw Mamoru. Mamoru. Mamoru wearing a black suit, green shirt, and black tie.

And even then, she refused to acknowledge the fact that she missed him before that.

So, she avoided him.

As always, she remained distant, cold, and uncaring. When all she wanted to do was rush to his side, touch him, hold him, and kiss him.

Kiss him. When was the last time she did that? It's not even a "real" kiss. A kiss on the cheek was all she ever had.

She sighed, absent mindedly clutching her coat around her cold body.

"Winter came early this year, I guess," she muttered.

(In a memory of things yet unseen)  
(I'd remember all that we've never been)

She could still remember the first winter she ever spent with him.

flashback

5 years ago...

It was two days before Christmas, and our entire group of friends decided to go on a road trip. We stopped on a ridge overlooking a big lake. The night was peaceful and calm.  
Food and drinks were passed around. It was a night of celebration. We were all having a good time way until early morning the next day.

It was around three in the morning when we all decided to go home. We came in with two cars so we planned how to split the group up. It was decided that I would ride with Rei, Yuuichiro, Makoto, and Motoki while he would be with Mina, Ami, and Ryu.

We then went around greeting each other a Merry Christmas. I was already inside Motoki's car when all of a sudden he opened the door and leaned in.

(And I can not wait to see (What life has in store for me)

"Merry Christmas, Usagi," he said, and all of a sudden kissed me on my cheek. It only lasted for a second, and then he was gone. But it took me almost half a minute before I realized that I needed to breathe.

That was my first Christmas kiss. I held on to that. I thought of it as my first "real" kiss. And he was the one who gave it to me.

end flashback

Usagi walked along, not really thinking where she was headed. Her footsteps moving quickly to ward off the cold.

"I really need to forget about him," she thought.

(In another lifetime)  
(It would be forever)

But deep inside she knew it was hard. That first Christmas kiss happened almost five years ago, and she still remembered it like it happened yesterday. She knew there was no way she would ever have it again. Because he didn't want her. Mamoru never wanted her.

flashback

6 months ago...

I am sooo mad at him right now. I thought it was just rumors flying around. Gossip mongers who don't have anything else to do with their lives.

But seeing is believing. I saw it, and I knew. I think he's having an affair with her.  
I didn't know if he loved her. All I knew right then and there was that it hurt!

And to think that I had been so happy yesterday. I thought, finally! I might actually have a chance! NOT!

---

It started with a dare during Motoki's birthday celebration the day before. Tequila was the drink of the day, and body shots were said to be in order. (AN: don't worry, they're of legal drinking age already... not to mention living on their own.)

Okaaayyy... Here is my chance. I can actually get to know how he tastes like.

Sigh... Do I really want to know?

So as not to arouse any suspicion, I started with the birthday boy, Motoki. Although technically, Mamoru did offer his wrist to me first, but I declined, saying the birthday boy has the privilege of being first in line.

Okay, wrist. Nothing wrong with that.

The second round, Yuuichiro offered.

It was his arm, no biggie.

Third round, I couldn't avoid Mamoru forever, right? So where do I lick?

Shoulder? Not bad. Taste? Salty. How did I feel? I don't know.

Being that close to him actually made me shut down my senses. I didn't know if it was the alcohol in my blood stream or whatnot, but that night, I made sure that I would not react to him.

I guess I was scared of what might happen if I let myself go. Eventually, the alcohol made me do it. I lost control.

(In another world)  
(Where you and I could be together)

Oh I remembered everything. I remembered I licked his neck, his cheek, and somewhere near his ear. I also remembered HE licked MY arm, MY neck, and MY forehead. Yup, you read right. HE licked ME. Funny thing was, I chose where to be licked and he chose where he wanted to be licked. Go figure.

That night, I went home drunk. I remember Mamoru walking me to my door. I also remembered him going in with me and helping me lie on my bed. (AN: I did mention that she was living on her own right? Actually she's living in a three bedroom apartment with Rei and Mina.  
cough moving on)

"Is this your room?"

"Yup," I answered with a stupid grin on my face.

"Cute cat," he said, while pointing to the plush toy hanging on the doorknob.

"Ummm hmmm."

"Get some rest," he said, as he helped me lie on my bed, noticing that he was also looking around my room.

"I see you have quite a collection of stuff toys, Usagi," he noted with a grin.

I looked over at the huge pile of stuffed animals at the corner of my room.

"Umm hmm," I nodded, still grinning like an idiot.

He smiled at me and said, "I have to go."

"Okay." And he left. I still was grinning like an idiot.

(In another set of chances)  
(I'd take the one's I'd missed and make you mine)

The next day, we decided to finish the left over alcohol (AN:don't ask!). And this time none of us got drunk. That is, except for Rose. I don't know if she planned it or something. But what happened next was something I never expected.

She got drunk and started throwing herself at Mamoru. Literally.

He would pull her away and make her sit down but she would stand right back up and again proceed to throw herself at him. He would push her away and leave her standing there, and then she would start falling on the floor as if fainting so he had no choice but again to pick her up.

This scene went on over and over again for the next 15 minutes. I started to get sick and wanted to throw up with the way she was acting all over him. Everyone else was also laughing at her antics.

It was then Mamoru decided to let Rose lie down instead. So me and Makoto helped her off of him and made her lie down in the small bedroom next to the living room.

She instead got up, and again threw herself at Mamoru. He then proceeded to bring her back to the bedroom. Upon lying on the bed she started to throw her arms around him, clearly not wanting him to leave her side. I noticed that he wasn't really bothered by this. And the way she had her arms around him seemed like she knew what she was doing.

As I was watching them, he seemed still to be the perfect gentleman. He was only helping a friend. A friend who wanted to have the lights turned off because SHE said it was hurting her eyes.

"Could you turn off the lights, Usagi?" Mamoru asked me from the doorway.

I did as he asked, but left the door open so at least I could still see what they were doing. But then he also asked me to close the door because SHE said the light from the living room was also too bright.

(If only for a time)  
(My life would matter)  
(In another life)

As I slowly closed the bedroom door I felt myself being torn inside. I went back to my other friends who didn't even think the situation to be too weird. Come to think of it, none of the other boys didn't even think of helping out. As I sat there staring at the door, unbidden thoughts surfaced in my mind. I couldn't breathe. I left the party complaining about a headache. But the truth was, it wasn't my head that was hurting. It was my heart.

end flashback

Usagi never really wanted it to end up this way. She thought she could make Mamoru realize that they were meant to be together. After all, if they were not destined to be together, then why would she still be feeling the same way for five long years, even after all the hurt and all the pain?

She believed in that word: destiny. Destined to be together. Forever and always. Soul mates. Intertwined fate. True love.

(And I'd stay as strong and I'd stay as true)  
(And you'd have forever now to think it through)

So why doesn't he feel the same way? Why doesn't he want me? Why won't he love me back?

flashback

3 months ago...

I couldn't help myself.

There he was, seated right beside me. I could smell his cologne because of our close proximity. I could feel his heat emanating from his body.

I couldn't help it.

I needed to feel him.

I touched him.

Mina forgot to confirm our reservations, so there we were, nine of us, sitting in a restaurant lounge waiting to be seated. Me, Mamoru, Mina, Ryu and Rei were seated in front, Yuuichiro, Ami, Motoki, and Makoto at the back. He and I were next to each other.

It was a simple touch, really. Mamoru was wearing a pink shirt that day.

I noticed he had a small stain in the front of his shirt. I pointed it out to him, and made the mistake of touching the stain. On his shirt. Him wearing said shirt.

"What is this? Where did it come from?" I asked, forefinger automatically touching the stained shirt.

"I think its toothpaste while I was brushing my teeth," he replied, while looking down at his shirt, "I was in a hurry." (AN: Oh, come on! I think you can relate to this one… yah know, early morning rush? cough...okaaayyy... on with the story)

By that time I had already removed my finger from his shirt, but I couldn't help but remember how good it felt to touch him.

I don't know how it started, or how long after we talked when it started, but I suddenly saw, rather than feel, my fingertips gently caressing his side. That area between his waist and his armpits. As soon as I did see what I was doing, it was then I realized how soft the material of his shirt was. Of how warm the body underneath the shirt was.

Then he stood up.

He proceeded to stretch and then walk towards the back and sat there. Beside Motoki. Away from me.

('Coz I do believe what wasn't meant to be)  
(Wasn't meant for now and someday you'll see)

As soon as he stood up, I froze. When he walked away, I panicked. When he sat behind me, I felt numb.

My Mamoru pulled away from me. He pulled away from my touch. He did not want to be with me. He did not want me touching him.

end flashback

Ever since then, Usagi had avoided him. Whenever she saw him, she would force herself to be numb and as much as possible not initiate any conversation with him.

(In a place and time we never knew)  
(I'd be standing there waiting for you)

But fate seems to having a grand time making fun of her.

flashback

2 and a half months ago.  
I was in the Crown Arcade leaning against the counter table listening to Rei and Mina gossiping about our next door neighbors when out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mamoru walking towards me.

(In another lifetime it would be forever)  
(In another world where you and I could be together)

I immediately turned my back on him. I was still mad at him for pulling away from me from that incident more than a week ago.

I suddenly felt his hand on my shoulder and he whispered, "Have you seen Motoki?"

"No."

I didn't even look at him when I answered him. He immediately left after my response and I let myself breathe again.

(In another set of chances)  
(I'd take the one's I'd missed and make you mine)  
(If only for a time my life would matter)

Mina suddenly asked me something and I immediately pushed the incident at the back of my mind.

end flashback

Usagi finally arrived at her destination. She was supposed to meet the girls for dinner. She knew they never understood what she was feeling. She tried telling them once. They thought it was just a passing fling. She'll get over it. A crush? At her age? She didn't think so.

So kept everything bottled up. She lied to them saying she was finally over her "crush". They were happy for her. She wasn't.

Why can't she just stop loving him? Why can't she just forget him and move on?

(In another life where you would be mine)  
(But until that time is now I'd be holding on somehow)

Deep down she knew the answer.

"He needs me," she thought, "He may not want me, but I know he needs me."

Whenever they were together she was happy. Simply because he was also happy. She knew everything about him, all his quirks, his dreams, his pain. She needed him, and deep down she knew that he also needed her.

She proceeded to enter the restaurant, heart still yearning for everything yet knowing she will receive nothing. She still loves him, of that she was sure.

She knew he was her soul mate, and that they were destined to be together.

Someday, Mamoru will realize that they are for each other.

He will realize that they are meant to be together. She will never give up. Even if it means forever. For it will be worth the wait.

(But until that time I'll be holding on to forever)  
(Until another life)

------

AN: Thanks for putting up with the angst of this short ficcy. All the flashbacks are actually based on true incidents, so yeah; you could say that all of this is actually based on my life experiences with my own Mamo-chan. Go figure.

Oh, and if you'd notice, "Rose" is the only non-Sailormoon character in the story. And yes, she is real. She happens to be a friend of his and ...uh... mine. As they say,  
keep your friends close, and keep your enemies closer. shifty eyes

Anyway, I'm sure everyone has their own Mamoru in their lives. Mine just happens to be... err... "unreachable" right now. So, please, feel free to review! Ja ne!

--- Aimee Hime 


End file.
